The journey of 1,000 miles, begins with a single step

Well, here goes nothing or is it here goes everything? Regardless, here I am. Since graduating college and starting my job, I’ve been doing some soul searching. I was well aware that things would play out as they have, what I wasn’t, was prepared to handle it. Essentially in one swift motion, I made the executive decision to stop training and to stop fighting, graduated college, left my entire sorority behind, moved out of the condo I shared with my sister and back into my parents house and began working a full-time job. The dust has settled and the reality is beginning to sink in.

I’ve been thinking a lot and looking to others for advice. I’ve received fabulous advice from amazing mentors, but I’ve also experienced negative influences from those same people. I’ve decided I am on a mission to discover myself; to become a woman I long to be and the woman I will eventually love more than anyone else. I will adopt the qualities I admire in others, and strive to overcome my own demons. This is a journey of self-discovery and self-love.

This past weekend, I finally set out to experience something I have long desired: I went skydiving. Yes, I jumped out of a perfectly good airplane. It was one of the most exhilarating experiences of my life, but, after the adrenalin rush wore, off the feeling that lingered was that of FINALLY taking action towards a desire. Being able to cross off “go skydiving” on my bucket list. That’s when the realization kicked in that life is what you make it.  That I am sitting in the drivers seat of my own life. I am TWENTY-ONE, yes, 21-years-old with a degree and a full-time job that I love and the hunger to make it big…and what’s standing in my way? Fear. I fear myself. I’m afraid that I will make it big. That I will put my head down and truck through life until I get to the top. Really though, I don’t want to get there with my head down the whole way. I want to feel the passion I felt when I used to fight; I want to hurt like when I failed; I want to be bruised and beaten and scared and excited and challenged. I want to laugh and cry and scream and yell. I want to feel something. In fact, I want to feel everything life has to offer.

So, here it goes. Feel free to join me on my journey of self-discovery; it will all be recorded, right here for the world to see. Here goes everything.

• go skydiving
• start a blog